How vast the Father's love for us

"How vast the Father's love for us..."

"It's not that I don't believe Jesus existed, it's more that he was a good guy that taught us good things.  He is one son of God, but not God's Son," said Mike as Charley and I sat on the cold grass in the middle of a small park in downtown San Diego.

"Mike," I responded "I don't believe that Jesus ever left it up to us to say that he was a good moral person. Either Jesus is who He says (that he could forgive sins because he was God), or he was a liar (which doesn't make him very moral), or he was a flat out lunatic."  I was thankful that God brought those words from CS Lewis to mind.  I saw Mike slowly begin to think more as our conversation continued on.

Over an hour later I couldn't help but be reminded of God's amazing love and grace.

You see, Mike has been homeless for 30 years.  He was sitting at the park where Charley and I met with 30 other UofA students to go out into San Diego to initiate spiritual conversations during our "Day of Faith."  Charley saw him on the way to our meeting location and offered him a sandwich he had bought for lunch.  God used Charley's heart for the homeless to bridge a gap that 15 minutes later allowed for a conversation to take place.  I truly believe that Mike could see Jesus right away in Charley.

Mike didn't decide to put his trust in Jesus, but I do believe that he is closer to making that decision.  At one point of the conversation as Mike mentioned how hard it is to let go of poor decisions he made years ago.  I looked at him and said, "Mike, you don't deserve forgiveness...............  But, I don't either.  The truth of the matter is that there is not one person on this planet who deserves what Christ has done, but He loves you so much that he offers it to you now.  You don't have to change before you come to Christ, He is meeting you right now and offering himself to you."

Charley shared part of his own testimony, or story about what God's done in his life.  He talked to Mike about the peace he has experienced in the midst of some really difficult and heart breaking situations.  I think this really resonated with Mike.  We didn't offer him a promise that if he came to know Jesus that all of his problems would be fixed (that he'd find a steady job, save money, get an apartment), but what we did offer him was hope and a joy that can't be taken away because of the forgiveness, restoration and relationship found in Christ.

When the conversation ended Mike thanked us both several times.  He told us that prior to this conversation he had been feeling really burdened, but now he felt like there was hope.  When he went to shake my hand I gave him a hug.  He really was a precious man and I feel like I saw before me a cold hardened heart begin to have some of the ice chipped away.

During our conversation I was struck several times with the overwhelming awareness of God's love for this man.  I couldn't help but see that God didn't make this conversation happen randomly as some sort of an afterthought, but that it was part of his plan all along...part of his intentional pursuit for Mike's heart.

I left also keenly aware of God's love towards me.  This was the first time in years I was able to go out on the Day of Faith, and God blessed me with this sweet conversation.

'The Lord is good and His love endures forever. Amen."

Life as a missionary

If you'd asked me years ago what my life would look like on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ, I would've mentioned a lot about campus life. I would've pictured conversations with students, hanging out in the dorms, leading Bible studies, getting into spiritual conversations with students from various religious and spiritual (if any) backgrounds.  

What I probably wouldn't have pictured was the hotel rooms.  

When I mention hotels and traveling it sounds so...adventurous and luxurious. And I guess in many ways it is a big adventure.  I get to travel every summer to different locations (California, New Jersey, Florida and Colorado being some of the recent places).  This spring break I will get to help lead a group of college students to our partnership campus in the Dominican Republic.  I have many opportunities on staff to travel not only in the United States, but throughout the whole world.  And maybe someday (in years to come) it will feel more like how it sounds (fun).

However, with two small kids I must admit that the traveling is a bit exhausting.  Sitting in dark hotel rooms when the kids go to bed or are napping, rearranging the furniture in the room to figure out how to fit the kids mini travel tents in the room, but far enough apart (if that's an option) so they don't wake each other up when they cough (because they are always somehow sick when we're on the road), and the hours in the car sometimes all just about push me over the edge of sanity.  

In the midst of a tough night (feeling disconnected from the actual conference going on, dealing with short naps and disobedient kids) I have to remember the bigger picture.  The bigger picture is what God is doing in the hearts and lives of real people around me, and through the ministry that I'm privileged to be a part of.  Right now there are hundreds of college students in the large ballroom hearing a speaker that God could use to literally change their life.  There are thousands of college students in different locations across the US experiencing the same thing. 

What makes it all worth it?  The gospel of Jesus Christ. The fact that Jesus not only died on the cross, but that he was resurrected.  He conquered death so that we may truly live! Christ's love, forgiveness and grace is not at all what I deserve, and yet He has given it to me through His blood on the cross.  My life as a missionary and all the dark hotel rooms in between the thousands of miles we travel are all worth it because other people get to know the Jesus that I know!

Loving myself some ricotta

Three reasons I love ricotta:

1. Lasagna
Enough said.

2. Pizza
I like to mix a little ricotta with the sauce when I make homemade pizza. It adds a richness and gives it a special sort of "umph" (trust me, you'll see what I mean).

3. Muffins
I had leftover ricotta that I didn't want to waste. In my oven (right now) are some ricotta orange berry muffins. Here is the recipe I found online from a blog called Not Just Baby Brain for What's for Breakfast-Blueberry Ricotta Muffins.  She got the recipe from this blog called Italialicious (and I think I will be looking at more of his recipes in the future).

*If I had all of the ingredients I would've done it as originally posted, but I didn't.
Here are the substitutions I made:
1. I didn't have any lemons so I just used the zest from one orange
2. I didn't have orange blossom water so I used about 1 tsp. of fresh orange juice & 1 tsp. vanilla
3. I didn't have fresh or frozen blueberries by themselves, but I did have a mixed frozen fruit bag (cherries, blueberries & blackberries) so I just chopped up the frozen berries & added them to the batter



Time elapse: 5 minutes

I just tasted them and I have one word: YUM!

Thankful

I am thankful for these silly, mischievous, sweet, funny, little faces!

(Rachel reading the paper)

(Logan and his cousin Max. This was nothing but trouble...okay, maybe some fun too!)

Keep on Running

I decided three weeks ago to run a half marathon that is in two weeks. Since I've run a half and full marathon before it's not quite as intimidating as it was the first go-around. Last weekend I ran 10 miles and my hope is to run 14 miles today.  I know that 14 miles is further than a half marathon, but I'm hoping to get my muscles used to the distance this weekend so I can run faster on race day.  


I think the hardest part about running is the mental part.  The times I tell myself "you can run further" it seems my body buckles up and gets it done.  I've got to admit that it's hard to keep a positive attitude when all I want to do is stop running. Thoughts like, "you can just stop, no one will know" or "no, you can't do it!" seem to creep up quietly unnoticed and then loudly yell in my ear over and over until I begin to believe it. 


Isn't this the same with sin? I doubt many people wake up in the morning excited and ready to sin (whether it be yelling at their kids or husband, to gossip about someone, or even look at something that will cause them to think things that aren't pure). Oftentimes it starts out kind of sneaky and quiet.  However, if it's left untreated it becomes a roaring lion and it has taken over control. 


Anyway, I'm realizing the more aware I become of the thought patterns in my life, be it on the treadmill for hours or when I look in the mirror at my reflection, the more I can recognize thoughts that honor the Lord and thoughts that send me down a path I don't really want to go.  


Philipans 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable,whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely,whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.


Okay, time to stop stalling and get stretching because I've got some pavement (or treadmill) to hit! 

Getting them to smile is just as hard as picking the perfect card!

I'm going to admit that getting a decent family picture for a Christmas card is not easy work.  However, I'm not sure if it's more difficult than deciding which Christmas card to order. I started looking on Shutterfly months before Christmas, and yet here I am on Thanksgiving needing to order a card ASAP, but can't decide what to do.  

I love the idea of a flat card that is simple and classic. I love this partially because some of our family like having a more recent picture to hang up, but this way it's not too Christmas-y.  Then again I would love to have a folded Christmas card with a more personal greeting on the inside.  In the past we've done some of the chocolate brown and maroon themed ones and I've liked those, but wondering if I want to do less of the "card" part and more of the picture part (if that makes sense).

As you can tell, it's hard to decide!  I did post a few of my favorites below with the links to the cards.  Now that I look it over again I realize I am leaning towards something more simple.  Let me know what you think, or if you find one here you think would be even better!  

If you click on this link it will take you to all the holiday cards and you'll see my option dilemma. http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/holiday-cards

Here are some simple ones that I like (BTW: that's not us in case you were wondering):

In the meantime I can't help but think a wall calendar like this http://www.shutterfly.com/calendars/wall-calendars would help me remember everyone's birthdays and I could put all the pictures that didn't fit on our Christmas card on our calendar!  

Also, since I'm thinking about Christmas gifts (and no I can't handle the crowds on a normal shopping day, so I'm not about to go out tomorrow for Black Friday) I wonder if the grandparents would like a mug with their grandkids on it? It's so much classier then the plastic ones we used to color in and give as gifts when we were growing up! http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-gifts/photo-mugs

Anyway, there are my Christmas card & other gift thoughts for the day! 

My Birthday Boy

I love my son. It is amazing to think back over the past 4 years and how much our life has changed because of this one little guy. I remember being slightly shocked realizing we could be pregnant. Sure we'd been married over a year, but this wasn't my "plan." Well, I am SO THANKFUL it was God's plan. Since it's my little boy's 4th birthday (although little man might be more accurate), I wanted to blog about some of the top four character traits I love about Logan.

1. Loving. Logan has this really sweet presence about him. He genuinely loves other people, and I can honestly say I can't recall a time he has ever spoken poorly or meanly about anyone (besides the occasional tattling on his little sister, but even then it's not "mean," just annoyed). We had a run-in with a bully last year, and he couldn't understand why anyone would want to be mean. It just did not make any sense to Logan why or how someone could be cruel.

2. Joyful. I love watching Logan's face light up when he sees his friends, or finds out we're having pizza (his favorite...along with tortillas, grapes, grilled cheese, cookies...), or hears we're going to have family time. Overall he is a very joyful boy, and it seems to be contagious to the other people he is around.

3. Empathetic. I often catch Logan studying my face or the faces of people in books or on shows. If he doesn't understand what someone is thinking or feeling he will say, "Mom, what does that face mean?" Times when I've been sad, his face will drop and he'll ask why I'm sad. He is a very perceptive little boy and I think this is a gift he has.

4. Forgiving. There have been many times over the past 4 years that I have lost my patience and not responded to my little boy in a loving and godly way. There have also, not surprisingly, been many occasions I have had to apologize to him and confess my harshness or frustration. Before I can even get to the "will you forgive me" part of my apology my son looks at me, smiles and says, "It's okay mom, I forgive you! And don't worry, Jesus forgives you too...that's why he died for you...for when you do bad things." Then, as though I have never been impatient or harsh, he smiles, hugs me and it's like he has totally forgotten about all my faults.  I have a lot to learn from my son in this area!

Creative Baking

I bought two books for my birthday Bakerella's Cake Pops & Cookie Craft.

I'm looking forward to more creative baking in the days to come! Here are two projects I worked on last month.


Bridal Shower Centerpieces:
Used Mod Podge and paper to decorate plain clay pots & styrofoam balls to hold the cake pops in place.  Hard to see in this picture, but they are red velvet in the inside, and are dark green with light green edible glitter on the outside, covered in plastic, and tied with a bow.

CRU-kies (CRU cookies):
I made 75 of these to advertise our freshman dinner. They were individually wrapped and handed out at our weekly meeting. They were sugar cookies with red food coloring in the dough, and then white or black frosting (I had to use a lot of food coloring so they didn't look gray).

Veggies with Spunk

We eat vegetables.  I said it, and it's true.  Not only do we eat them, but we generally like them.  However, sometimes we get a little bored from eating the same things over and over.  

Here's a glimpse at our grocery list each week for vegetables: broccoli, asparagus, sweet potatoes, green beans, green & red leave lettuce, mushrooms, red peppers, tomatoes, beets, carrots, jicama

Here are two new recipes I made this week, both of which I  thought were delicious enough to share.

1.  Butternut Squash Fries:  we've been making sweet potato fries (the healthy way) for a few years, but these were a nice change.  Surprisingly they tasted "more" like regular fries.  Seriously yummy.

2. Roasted Cauliflower: looking forward to making more next week. To this recipe I added garlic (I didn't use a garlic press, I just took off the outside and roughly chopped up). There are A LOT of roasted cauliflower recipes online.

Another staple in our lives are roasted beets. We generally put them on salads, but I like eating them plain too.  They are a little messy, but pretty easy. In the beginning of the week I just make 4-6 at a time, cut up, and store in the refrigerator so they're ready when we need them.  

How To: peel, cut off ends, prick with a fork (like you would a potato), wrap in foil, place on cookie sheet and cook at 425 for about an hour. I let them sit in the foil after they're out of the oven for 15-30 minutes (they keep steaming, which you may or may not need depending on their size). Then I cut them up into smaller bite-sized pieces before storing in the refrigerator.  

Vegetables I'd like to start using more: eggplant & pumpkin.  The only problem is that vegetables and fruit are so expensive so we try to buy what's on sale.  Maybe they'll both be on sale soon!

If you have any creative ways to cook vegetables, please don't hesitate to share with me!!!!  

Parenting & the Gospel

Let's face it, parenting is tough!

By the looks of this picture I'd say being a baby is tough too.

There have been a lot of times lately I've felt completely overwhelmed. I don't know if you've seen or remember the movie Groundhog Day, but I feel like I'm stuck in the same day that just keeps repeating itself. When the alarm clock goes off (aka: the sound of Logan yelling, "Mommy I need to go potty"), I sadly find myself looking forward to the next stage (when Logan can get up without yelling, take care of Rachel, and then around 10am bring us a nice breakfast in bed) instead of embracing the one I'm in.

However, there is a huge part of me that wants to have more children some day. What does this mean (besides the fact that I might be a little crazy)? Children are a HUGE blessing and a gift from the Lord (I mean just look at those cute faces). Even at the end of a tough day there is something about looking in at the kids sound asleep and thinking I wish I could just hold them and never let them go because in many ways they are growing up too fast! Yes, I know I contradict myself. I'm really quite indecisive when it comes to wanting the kids to stay little forever and wanting them to grow up yesterday.

This summer I was able to spend time with some godly staff moms that I deeply respect. There was something noticeably different (and great) about how they lived out and communicated the gospel to their children. It's encouraged me to really seek the Word as I figure out this whole parenting thing. I've found some great resources that have also been helpful: "Shepherding a Child's Heart" by Ted Tripp, Gospel Centered Parenting (a sermon podcast 2 part series by CJ Mahaney), and "How People Change" by Timothy Lane & Paul Tripp.

Our reactions to our circumstances have consequences. Our responses, whether godly or ungodly, help create a new set of circumstances to deal with. If I get irritated with my son when he doesn't do what I say, I create a new set of circumstances. When I sin, I make the problem worse, even if my son obeys me. When I respond in godly ways, it doesn't guarantee that my son will respond as I would like, but it does ensure that I am not a hindrance to the work of God in his life. (from How People Change)

I have a lot to learn, but I am thankful for the power of the gospel that is changing me. I don't need my kids to see a perfect mom (since I'm not). I don't want them to see a mom who tries to be perfect either. Instead I pray that they'll see a mom who knows she needs a savior, a mom who is willing to confess her sin, say she's sorry, and ask for forgiveness (yes, even from a one year old). I pray that they'll notice a change in my character over the years as God transforms my heart. I pray that they too will see how much they need Jesus in their lives.

Logan and Rachel were running around playing the other day when he looked at me and said, "Mom, we're on the same team! We're both superheros!" I pray that they will both see Jesus as their ultimate hero and savior and that they will spur one another on towards godliness.

Toddler Theology

We have one children's Bible and the story of Jonah basically starts like this:

God told Jonah to go to Nineveh to tell the people, "Stop doing bad things."

The following excerpt is from the Jesus Storybook Bible

God had a job for Jonah. But Jonah didn't want it. "Go to Nineveh," God said, "and tell your worst enemies that I love them."

"No!" said Jonah. "Those are bad people doing bad things!"

"Exactly," said God. "They have run far away from me. But I can't stop loving them. I will give them a new start. I will forgive them."

This summer we have the opportunity to have many spiritual conversations on the boardwalk in Ocean City. When I think about how Christians are often portrayed on television shows (Freeks and Geeks is one that most people didn't watch, but is a classic example) it reminds me how often we are seen as people who just "stop doing bad things" (aka: follow this list of do's and don'ts & try harder to become a better person).

I had read the first toddler Bible to Logan many times and didn't realize until the other night exactly what was wrong with the theology. As I read the Jesus Storybook Bible out loud to Logan and read the above part, Logan responded by saying "God loves me and you love me too mom!"

Christianity is about a relationship with a loving God. What hope would there be if we were told simply to "stop doing bad things"? Maybe I could manage my sin for some time, maybe I could overcome some things by positive thinking, setting up a three step plan, avoiding certain situations...but simply by trying to be a better person my heart would not be changed nor would I be forgiven for my past sins or present mistakes.

Hope comes when I meet the Savior, the person of Christ. Hope comes when I realize that He can forgive my sins and give me a new start, and He can transform who I am.

The Jesus Storybook Bible goes on to say (when Jonah eventually went to Nineveh):

"Even though you've run far from God, he can't stop loving you," Jonah told them. "Run to him! So he can forgive you."

The people of Nineveh listened to Jonah, and they started loving God. They learned to do what God said and to stop running away from him--just like Jonah.

Many years later, God was going to send another Messenger with the same wonderful message. Like Jonah, he would spend three days in utter darkness.

But this Messenger would be God's own Son. He would be called "The Word" because he himself would be God's Message. God's Message translated into our own language. Everything God wanted to say to the whole world--in a Person.

It's amazing how closely I need to pay attention to what I'm reading to Logan when it comes to learning about God. Even many children's Bibles don't seem to have their theology straight and start teaching kids about religion and how to act, instead of about the most important relationship that they could ever have with the only one who is capable of forgiving them for when they do mess up (which is inevitable...have you spent time with a toddler recently?), and helping to change them at a heart level.

Our sandbox

Living so close to the beach brings back memories of living in Pismo Beach. Sigh.

This week is student orientation, so I'm trying to figure out how to keep the kids occupied and happy since they won't see Chris as much. I made pancakes for breakfast and we were out the door by 9:30 to go to our big sandbox. Here are a few pictures. Should've gotten one of me carrying Rachel in the ergo in the front (baby carrier), backpack on my back, bag of sand toys in my right hand, and Logan in my left hand. I'm sure it was hilarious since I kept having people smile/laugh at me the few blocks we had to walk.

Overflow of our hearts

As I've noticed Logan misbehaving a lot the past few days (we've been in Ocean City for 5 days, so he's dealing with transition) it's made me think about how I act/react to situations in life. It's easy for me to get frustrated and mad at his behavior and want him to quickly just "shape up", but I am (finally) realizing more and more that I need to address his heart and what's really going on. Fear, embarrassment, anger, exhaustion: I need to get to the root of his behavior.

I want to become a mom who knows my kids and can help draw out their hearts, but honestly it's hard to know how to do that. I know that God is so patient with me. I've been studying Ephesians and for some reason chapter 1:7,8 keep resonating with me: "In Him (Christ) we have redemption (means to buy or purchase something) through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace which he lavishes on us." I think the word LAVISHES every time just stands out to me. It doesn't say that he sprinkles a little grace here and there, but that he lavishes his grace on us.

I desire to raise our children in a house where they don't just see us out talking about the gospel, but it is a gospel that rings true in our hearts and is lived out in our household. The last thing I want is to talk about the cross and the relationship God wants with us through what Jesus did on the cross...but then succumbing to "religion" when it comes to behavior and discipline.

As a staff team (there are about 40 of us) we've been sharing our testimonies (stories about how/when we came to know Christ) and it has struck me how many of us grew up in "religious" homes, but didn't know the gospel. Many of us come from performance driven homes with performance-driven faith (you must do, act, be a certain way to win God's favor) instead of the saving faith described in Ephesians 2:8 "for it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this not of yourselves, it is the gift of God".

I pray that I will continue to be convicted of my own sin and led to repentance. There is no way I can ever be the perfect model because that will always only be Jesus. What I can do is lead my children in humility (let them see me when I mess up, see how I confess that, and ask the Holy Spirit to make me be the kind of person He wants me to be), ask God to help give me a spirit of patience and grace with them, and learn how to ask questions that won't just focus on the behavior, but what's behind the behavior.

After a really hard day yesterday (Logan tends to act up by asking for food for meals and then refusing to eat. It took him 2 1/2 hours to eat half of a quesadilla) I missed our staff time and stayed home with the kids. After getting Rachel to bed I spent extra time reading to Logan, singing him songs before bed and talking to him about his day. I did the best I could to explain to him that there will always be consequences for our sin or for the bad things we do (which he followed by saying, "yes, everybody makes mistakes and that's why Jesus died for us") but that I don't want him to just say he's sorry so he can get back to playing but I want to know why he acted up. I told him that he can tell me if he is sad, scared, tired, or whatever he's feeling. We hugged and I prayed for him (which he repeated the prayer as I was saying it, which was really cute).

It's hard figuring out how to talk with a 3 1/2 year old, partly because he may not know why he's acting the way he is (God knows there are many times I can't figure out why I act the way I do), but it is worth it to keep pursing my kids. I am so thankful that God has pursued and continues to pursue me.

Reflecting on "my call"

This weekend we had our annual Spring Regional Conference. Dennis Rainey (Family Life ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ) and his son Samuel were our speakers. Dennis asked us to reflect upon "Spiritual Milestones" or times we remember God working in our lives (some could be painful experiences, others joyous...but either way "significant").

I still haven't had a lot of time to reflect, but there is one that stands out in my mind and I thought it would be helpful for me to actually type it out.

It was the late summer of 1999 and I was about to start my freshman year of college at Ohio University. My grandpa (Logan Reif) had cancer. Knowing that he didn't have much time left, my parents and I booked a flight out to Sun City, Arizona (about 3 1/2 hours from where we now live in Tucson) to see him in person. One of the mornings we were there my grandpa told me he had something very important I needed to tell the family. My parents and I found a tape recorder, and brought paper and a pen so that we could make sure to write down whatever it was that was so important.

Later that afternoon my grandpa looked straight in my eyes, pointed at me, and said, "Vanessa, this is what you need to tell the family. You need to tell them that Jesus said, 'I am the way, the truth, and the life, and no one comes to the Father but through me.'"

It was a powerful moment.

I had enough of a church background to know that what he had just told me was somewhere in the Bible (I found out it was Jon 14:6 when I looked it up), but I had no idea why I was the one he asked to relay the message. My parents were both in the room, and we have since had many conversations about that moment (how he specifically singled me out from them to share this message & wondering why).

My grandparents (Logan & Helen Reif) were Christians, but since then I have found out that both of them at times questioned their faith. I'm sure they had many of the same questions I have when looking at our world and seeing the suffering, pain, poverty (sometimes knowing that all of this is a result of a fallen/sinful world doesn't seem satisfactory enough) and I know my grandma in particular really struggled with her faith when she battled cancer (she had never smoked, had alcohol, been overweight or done really anything to abuse her body, and I know that cancer seemed unfair to her), but honestly I don't know much about their faith journey. My uncles have different knowledge of their parents' faith journey and have their own opinions about what I "must have heard incorrectly" about what he wanted me to tell them (a long story not worth explaining on here).

What do I know about my grandpa based on what he told me? I know that no matter what doubts or questions he had during his lifetime, that when he faced death he gained a sense of clarity. This clarity made him realize that he needed to make sure this message got out to his family. There was a, I don't even know the word, maybe "urgency" about the way he wanted to make sure our family knew this.

I brought a pen and paper to make sure I'd remember what he wanted me to tell the family, but I don't need a pen and paper to remember it. It is one of the simplest and most complex things about the Christian faith. Jesus makes himself clear, his mission, his purpose, and leaves room only for our response.

Jesus said, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

Besides this moment being significant because it was the last face-to-face conversation I had with my grandpa, it is significant because it redirected the plans I had for my life (plans to be a successful Public Relations professional). During my time at Ohio University my faith grew like it had never before. I began to see just how personal God is and I began to see how few people believed in the words that Jesus says. As I took a step of faith to share that message with my entire family through a letter, my heart was burdened knowing that outside my family there were millions of other people who didn't know the truth.

Whenever I think back to the message my grandpa asked me to share with our family, I realize that at that moment God was giving me a direct calling for my life as a minister of His gospel (which has led me to being on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ, or "Cru" as we call it at UofA). It is during these times of reflection that I am once again reminded of God's faithfulness in my life and his personal leading.

In November of 2004 our son was born. His name is Logan. Someday I look forward to explaining exactly where his name came from, the legacy left by those before him, and the high calling he too can be a part of no matter what he chooses to do with his life. I pray that our Logan will grasp the importance of what Jesus said.

I am the way

I am the truth

I am the life

No one comes to the Father.....

Except through ME (Jesus)

All dressed up

Love these kids, even if they do roll around on the floor of the church lobby in their "Sunday best".

Preparing for Easter

Sometimes when I look at photos of my kids I like to make up a fake conversation that "happened" (I think it's called pretending). Anyway, with Easter right around the corner it would go like this:

Rachel: Logan, what is Easter about?

Logan: Well, Rachel it's ultimately about Christ's resurrection. Do you know what resurrection means?

Rachel: No, but is it snack time yet?

Logan: Pay attention Rachel, this is important.

Rachel: Okay, but can you use little words instead of dad words?

Logan: Fine. I'll do the best I can. Remember how much Jesus loves us?

Rachel: Yes, he loves me thiiiiiiiis much.

Logan: Well, remember how we do bad things sometimes? Like when you try to rip my hair out?

Rachel: Yes, that's not very nice even if I do think it's funny.

Logan: Well, Jesus died for you and me and everybody so that we can be forgiven for all the bad stuff we mean to do and the bad stuff we don't even know we do...like the things that mom tells us are bad, but we didn't know.

Rachel: Like when you locked the bathroom door & shut it so no one could get in?

Logan: Yes. Well, Jesus died, but then on Easter He was alive! He conquered death Rachel, it's a pretty big deal.

Rachel: Conquered?

Logan: Yes! It means that he didn't stay dead, but Jesus is alive!

Rachel: Oh. Well then, can Jesus get my snack because I'm still hungry.

Apparently Rachel got tired of waiting for someone to get her snack & she pushed her red chair over to the table, stood on top, and reached her juice & some cookies I had taken out of the oven. Smart girl...or coincidence. Either way it made for a funny picture

Who wants to know of ways to make the holidays that are supposed to be about Jesus, really about Jesus? (Rachel says, "I do! I do!" as she fashionably wears her hat that reminds me of the Strawberry Shortcake characters).
Now I see why she wants to know more: her mafia picture proves (pretzel cigar, overalls or stroller straps, and the way she is giving someone "the look") she needs Jesus (okay, we all do)!

Okay, now for the reason I really decided to post something tonight (yes, the rest was all just random fluff). Noel Piper (John Piper's wife) wrote a book that is called "Treasuring God in our Tradition" and you can find it on the Desiring God website as a free download if you go HERE.

I heard about it from a friend of mine and decided to look into for ideas for Easter. There are some great ones, but since I got sick this week (tonsillitis) and the medication is making me nauseous I haven't gotten to any of her great ideas. Still I am thinking about the next few nights reading out of Logan's Bible (The Jesus Storybook Bible...I recommend this above any other kids story Bible btw), having a celebration Easter morning where we play music, dance & shout "He's Alive!" and then in his Easter basket have things that are different colors and can represent different aspects of Easter. I still haven't made any final decisions.

Anyway, do you have ideas that you've tried (for a 3 year old & 1 year old) that you'd like to pass on? If so, please leave a comment because I'd love to hear!

For the baby mama (& family)

I feel really blessed in life to have such great family and friends. After giving birth to both kids we had so many awesome meals brought over by our friends (both in San Luis Obispo where Logan was born, and here in Tucson where Rachel was born). I remember what a blessing it was to not have to worry about making dinner, getting groceries, or any of those details.

Here is my go-to meal when I take food to families who have recently had baby: Chicken Caesar Pasta Salad, French bread (I cut & butter & wrap in foil so they can just pop it in the oven), and of course dessert (I try to remember fruit too, but recently I forgot about that). What I like about the meal is that it's simple, fresh, and generally not something that someone else is making. Plus there aren't too many spices just in case a nursing mom is worried about that (I was with Logan, but wasn't with Rachel...both seemed equally gassy so not sure if it made a difference or not).

Since I love dessert, I'll start there and share my latest recipe attempt...and success! Here are Bakerella's Snickerdoodle Duo (taken from Martha Stewart recipes). The cupcake and cookie are both made from scratch, but I bought simple white frosting for the middle and put a little food coloring to make it pink. Not gonna lie, they taste amazing. I decided they would transfer better if I didn't have frosting on the top like Bakerella did...and I'm thinking about always doing a cookie on top when I want to send or take cupcakes places now. Seriously. Much easier, and oh so yummy! Here is the RECIPE.

I've also started making onsies or tiny shirts to put with the food. Here are pics of two different kinds I've made. I blurred out some of the details for privacy issues for the families, but you get the point.

Here is a picture of the salad all ready to be tossed together when they are ready to eat. I use a rotisserie chicken because I like the flavor, pasta (with a little of the caesar dressing so it doesn't get sticky, plus the flavor soaks in), parmesan cheese, croutons, Romain lettuce, and I give them a bottle of the dressing. This fit in a 9X13 disposable baking dish, which is also easier for them to cleanup (but you could do separate containers, or whatever).

Cupcake all wrapped up. I had to make them a day in advance and wanted to keep them fresh.

And here is one of the packages all put together (thanks to a leftover basket from Christmas and a little ribbon).

To everyone who gave us meals when we had our kids: THANK YOU! Especially when we had Rachel and our closest family was a 12-hour drive away...we felt loved and blessed and taken care of. I can only hope and pray others will feel just as blessed by our food.

Oh me, Oh my...better than pie

Ridiculous title for the post. I know. The truth is: I love pie! So, it isn't an attempt to say that the following two desserts are actually better than pie, it just happened to rhyme.

It's probably no secret how much I love chocolate, but even better than plain chocolate is molten lava chocolate!!!! Gooey in the middle, warm and cake-y on the outside...delicious!

I've made a few molten lava cakes in the last few years, but this recipe is my FAVORITE and also seems to be the easiest. Just to make sure I wasn't fooling myself, we had over a few friends on Saturday night and they were a hit for them too.

I've mentioned her blog before (and maybe this recipe) but seriously, if you aren't following The Pioneer Woman, what are you waiting for? Here is her post about the recipe she found on the Tasty Kitchen:

Molten Lava Cake (click on this link or copy & paste below)

http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2009/07/molten-chocolate-lava-cake/

Since I made these on Saturday, I figured something with fruit would be better for our small group potluck on Sunday night. I didn't really want to have to buy anything I didn't have in our kitchen already, so I found a recipe on the Tasty Kitchen and adapted it. Why I didn't take picture? I have no idea!

So, here is the original recipe for Strawberry Cobbler Cake http://thepioneerwoman.com/tasty-kitchen/recipes/desserts/strawberry-cobbler-cake/

What I did differently: I doubled the recipe & baked in a 9 X 13 X 3 stoneware cake pan. I think it took about 60 minutes. I also used frozen fruit that I had thawed and did strawberries, blueberries & blackberries. I will make this again! (*drool)

Rachel's first birthday

I can't believe it's already been 1 year since my sweet baby girl was born.

A lot changes in a year...

The birthday girl one year later (already half her friends are in college)...

So we all celebrated with little homemade cake: white cake with raspberry filling,

raspberry-chocolate buttercream frosting, and fondant decorations...I love baking!

Rachel's cake:

Logan's cake (or so he thought, but in reality the rest of us and our guests shared this one):

Logan giving his baby sister some pointers about what to do with the cake:

My inspiration for the cake design:

I feel so incredibly blessed to have this little girl in my life. It is fun seeing bits of her personality become more defined: she's a bit of a firecracker (she's got spunk even at this age); determined (when she sees dad's records she will do anything to get to them and throw them down); silly (she likes rolling around the couch laughing and growling); sweet (she claps for us when we do things she likes, blows kisses, and smiles at everyone); independent (put her in a room full of kids and she'll go find some stuff to do by herself for awhile).

Thank you Jesus for the privilege of being a mom to Logan and Rachel!